Thursday, December 23, 2010

Christmas party for the children with intellectual disability at MINDSville@Napiri

Date:20 dec 2010
Time:2pm-6pm

i tot we r going to visit the homless kids oni, becos i didnt really read the email, then i realise the children there are with intellectual disabilities. at first abit scared coz was wondering how to deal with them, but slowly, i enjoy this event, and would like to participate more.

i paired with this girl, we can't really communicate as she can't talk and it seems she has problem of understanding things, her hands r being tied as the nurse she is uncontrollable, she will run away.she can't talk but she always want to kiss or hug you, starting abit scared, but ultimately i realise a way that can calm her down---- food =x
personally i like this boy, he seems polite and mild~ i duno why he's been tied up becos he seemed normal to me, but at least when i say Hi to him, he replied me like..immediately..=)

actually i am quite lucky, on and off come back to the same company to work during holiday, its not usual i guess, and currently happy working, althu i feel sleepy and tired all the time ~.~

Saturday, October 23, 2010

suddenly..i dun feel like going this church again.....i dun feel like socialise there anymore..i feel tired ...but...after watching the trailer of "most", my feeling toward God's love grows stronger, i wanna worship him, but i start to wonder, if mt well's acmc is the right place for me.

Wednesday, October 06, 2010

bits and pieces

The Korean style noodle that our lady boss made for us..yummy~~

New zealand fashion week 2010, eh...nth much to see?


mango mooncake in my hand, and green tea mooncake in the box



one of my favourite frm J'S tea, caramel pudding~



my hair colour, i think not bright enough =_=



i am so amazed to find this in auckland, reminds me of my old times with the birds. this is fake anyway



acting cool? =_=



banana split,@new market



play around with my clothes, mix and match


Saturday, September 18, 2010

bigger hole in my pocket

Leave house at 8.30AM today, me, yy and rebec follow Kelly to East Tamaki, kind of warehouse sale. thought of juz window shopping, coz the sale there is like skin care, make up and fragrances, i thought i wont be that interested to buy but they were like "we shall see"...

It is an Elizabeth Arden sale, the prices there are really much lower than retail price, http://shop.elizabetharden.com/family/index.jsp?categoryId=2779912&view=all

so in the end, i bought a few, eye cream, moisture lotion, eye shadows, and some gifts that i prepare for frens' bday. even saw britney, hilary duff, usher and M's fragrances, the prices are really good, didnt know they are under Elizabeth Arden till today.

quite guilty sia coz the hole in my pocker is getting bigger! recently abit over-spending, my exam results also not that good so i feel super guilty now. shit..shall control!

Sunday, September 12, 2010

a not too bad term break

had a not too bad term break, with a not too bad mood.

Went for ski trip again, this time, i tried snowboard, haha i like it, but i still don't know how to break tho, but its fine, i would like to try it again.

randomly formed a small IB301 study group as well, totally random, but at least get to do some study aye?
last nite went to watch this musical called Luctatio Ultima by our uni students(mainly?). starting abit confused but getting better later on. overall? okay lar but not say very fantastic =x
and tmr gonna visit the china warship..and school starts. oh well~

anyway, have to praise NZL, level7 earthquake but no death, dats quite amazing, well done...
cut my hair aniway...



video

Sunday, August 08, 2010

few more hours to my birthday again~~hmmm not too excited about it...like getting numb for birthdays~ sigh... i wanna be more mature though..

when can our family celebrate birthdays together? i am waiting for the day, the day that i am able to earn more money and able to get my parents some really nice birthday presents!

meanwhile, i pray to Lord for my last try to OZ. juz give me one more try.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

i hate farewells, i hate goodbyes, i hate changes.

i have enough of them, i really hate to face them, but sadly i just have to face the fact that, i will never able to avoid them. they just happen as time goes by.

that's why i always ask myself, what if my mum didn't leave? what if i didn't go Singapore? What if i didn't come to auckland?

especially auckland, you will never know when u have to say goodbye to the person you know, it just seems that its an unavoidable fact that people in this city just come and go.

hais watever, and i am still thinking if i should visit the other church. sigh.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

don't be a 无病呻吟 person. annoying.

Wednesday, July 07, 2010

quick post before going out

just realise my recent posts are toooooo heavy. post sth more casual this time?

i juz moved house. from a townhouse to a student apartment. totally new experience, as i have to go down to use public washing machine to do the laundry. but besides that, things are fine =)


ex-place:



Now```

kinda like my noticeboard...

if only mum could be happier, my life will be so much easier, i could not feel easy when she keep being like that, sometimes i really wonder, am i making the wrong choice to come here? am i the one that cause us both in this situation? "it's not that i don't want to do sth about it, i just don't know what can i do..."

Monday, July 05, 2010

to me, somehow, i still can manage my stress from studies i think? i don't know why, maybe i just feel that its kind of meaningless to whine about the results and all those.... since...you can't change anything; it's all done. you just have to move on i guess, as a student, this kind of stress is quite foreseeable isnt it?and stress from exam is not gonna kill you i guess.

or maybe is because, other stresses are already over the stress from studying. i am really helpless to change the current situation, all the conversations with my family become so heavy, and it seems that i should not complain and express how unhappy i am with my mum because i know that she suffers maybe at least 10 times or 100 times more than me, i know how hard her life is, but what can i do? i feel awful w/o family all these years but the same goes to her isnt it? she seldom pour her sorrows to me but i bet she cried many times behind me. but i am just unable to see her, unable to encounter the hard times together with her, we are both stuck in the middle, i really cant figure out when we can really settle down. i really need MIRACLE..MIRACLE PLEASE.

Dear Lord,
I really feel bad that when i feel i can't do anything and needs your help, then i come to you. but besides asking for your help..i really don't know what else i can't do...please, this feeling is getting worse, i really need your help, i really need miracle..please bless us and please watch over my family and send an angel to protect my mum. some people just end their lives when they can't overcome their stress, i will never thought of that, but i am really tired, i can't see the light now, i don't wanna live aimlessly. i need you to guide me. please please help me.

In Jesus's name, I pray. Amen.

Saturday, June 26, 2010

當一個人一直回想著過去的美好回憶,是不是表示,她現在過得不快樂?

是我。

我在想,我現在是不是不快樂?所以總偶爾回味著過去。。。

我到底有嘗試過真正快樂的感覺嗎?連我自己都不能回答。

活在這樣的環境下,我真的能感覺到真正的快樂嗎?我連跟父母普通相處的機會都沒有,我的性格能不沒有缺陷嗎?

多羡慕那些幸福的家庭啊。多羡慕那些不用到處漂泊的人啊。

連自己都不瞭解自己,連未來會在哪裡,做些什麽都無法確定的我,為何表面看起來是開朗的呢?我根本是個缺乏安全感的人吧,多想封閉自己啊,但這個社會允許我活在自己的世界封閉自己嗎?NO.

再加上媽媽給的壓力,天啊,我是怎麼活過來的?

Monday, May 10, 2010

Happy Mother's day Still...

another mama day's gone, yet this is just another mama day without my mum by my side again..father's day is coming yea? yet it will be another dad's day without my dad by my side...sometimes i really hope there won't be any festivals like this...but what to do? when can i really celebrates all these with them? QUESTION MARK.

aniway...althou future is still so unknown to me, but sometimes i realise i can comfort myself to face it with a better attitude...ever since i came to nzl, i just feel that some1's helping me...otherwise, juz by myself, how could i be able to solve all the problems i faced here? i feel so blessed when i look for accomadation and jobs, and my study too, always last minute but still safe. all these are hard to just use the word "lucky" to describe...and because of this, i start to believe GOD is actually watching over me...well, i've never thought myself believe in this, esp when i was in SG, i detest Christian, coz some of them are just so...yucks...opps...forgive me to say that. but here, i can really feel the peace, and a few times, my heart's touched, i can't explain the feeling but i juz can't explain why my tears came out...

and I've meet some gals i kinda like...well, got feel? lols...nice to hug too =x

aniway, partly becos of IP MAN 2, i decided to go for Wing Chun lesson next thurs, hope it will be a nice one.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

This city is still kind of strange to me..sigh..

what happend to me last night? i don't meant to expose my weakness infront of a group of pple..what happend?

Tuesday, April 13, 2010




miss the old me..and my long hair...


gosh international business really make me cant relax everyday,firstly i didnt study, secondly is becos, i don't know how to study for that. jialat.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

stress

starbuck becomes my motivation and the little drink that spice up my day~


the cupcakes ( 19 march 2010) c.g meeting


recently just feel very stress ~~ feel like i've been slacking again but i can't be like this for my current subjects! not as easy..and tests are coming! haiss

stress...this period really feel the financial stress...shit..mainly coz mum's have a new plan for her work..hope she get that shop for her tailoring biz...PRAY HARD! hais...sometimes i feel quite upset...why it seems i am one of the fews that needs to work to support my daily expenses while other kids are happily studying without this extra stress? but i know i just have to deal with it! i just nid to vent it out here! arhhh i am tired....and when it comes to attend activities, i feel quite suck to be w/o my own transport and have to trouble others! i hate this feeling! hates it, i don't wanna trouble others, i don't like the feeling when i can't control my own schedule etc...

hais..feel so mess up now...hates it...but i just can't be like other pple..they are able to easily express their anger, their sadness, their moody, i just not able to do this, i hates this too! but eventually, u just have to deal and solve ur own problem BY YOURSELF.no one else.

Thursday, March 04, 2010

blog in school

can't believe i am doing this, blogging in school library? feel so nerdy =x LOL... anyway just for once...around 15 more mins to the next and last lesson of the day.. ends at 4pm again...tiring~

school's started...like suddenly; sudden as in i don't really feel like i am prepared for that. well, 3 of the modules do not have course book to sell, which means i have to check and print out the notes every week! they just dun want to put all the notes at once and i don't know why, this is bad for lazy pple like me! i just prefer them to sell the whole course notes nicely instead of print them myself everyweek. arh hates it =( most of my modules requires lots of writing and reading, i hope i can survive.

anyway, currently working at a souvenier shop, under training thu but i hope things go right, as i feel quite comfortable working there =x

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Copy from somewhere... =)

1,如果发短信息给一个人,他一直不回,不要再发了。没有这么卑微的等待。
2、如果没有人陪,学着一个人听音乐看书写点心情日记。这是个好习惯。
3、如果一个人很难过,找个角落或者在被子里哭一下,不需要别人同情可怜,哭过之后一样开心生活。
4、如果一个人开始怠慢你,请你离开他。不懂得珍惜你的人不要为之不舍,更不必继续付出你的友情或爱情,到头来受伤的是自己他人不会为之难过。
5、如果可以不抽烟,别抽。如果可以不喝酒,别喝。这是不爱惜自己身体的表现,如果只因一些人,那么我们别傻了,爱你的人不会让你难过的。
6、伤心的时候找个信任的朋友诉说一下,不要一个人默默承受,这只会会更添寂寞感与忧伤。

7、不开心的时候白天看看蓝天晚上看看夜色,广阔的天空自有属于我们 爱,宁可高傲的发霉不要低调的恋爱。跟自己说我是最好的。保持一份自信。
8、宁缺毋滥。不要因为寂寞随手抓一个恋人,这对两人都不公平,而且太缺乏责任感。找个知己不要是恋人。
9、记住你喜欢的人的生日,包括你的家人,当然,还有自己。生日没有人送礼物也无所谓,你可以买精美的礼物,送给妈妈和爸爸。
10、闲下来的时候,放一段柔情音乐,翻阅几页好书,然后睡个懒觉,快哉。心情不好的时候,也可以睡一觉。
11、从现在开始,聪明一点,不要问别人想不想你?爱不爱你?若是要想你或者爱你自然会对你说,但是从你的嘴里说出来,别人会很骄傲和不在乎你。
12、不要太在意一些人太在乎一些事,顺其自然以最佳心态面对,因为这世界就是这么不公平往往在最在乎的事物面前我们最没有价值。
13、不要为了任何人任何事折磨自己。比如不吃饭、哭泣、自闭、抑郁,这些都是傻瓜才做的事。当然,偶尔傻一下有必要,人生不必时时聪明。
14、任何情况下,背后不说他人是非。如果一定要你说,说好话。多个朋友是好事,即使不是很要好的,总比因为自己说话不慎重不思考而多一个敌人好得多。
15、允许偶尔看肥皂剧,但不可成为依赖。允许偶尔披头散发,但要注重场合。允许偶尔骂脏话,但只限在老友面前或者独自一人时,记得说过后要忘掉那些让你难过的事。
16、一定要有几个异性朋友,没有非分之想.就是关键时候,帮你出出主意的好友。
17、学会承受痛苦自己调整心态。有些话,适合烂在心里,有些痛苦,适合无声无息的忘记。当经历过,你成长了,自己知道就好。很多改变,不需要你自己说,别人会看得到。
18、能不和人争吵尽量避免。一个发怒的人是很恐怖的,会因控制不了情绪变成疯子。忍耐然后思索问题的根源最后平静心态解决它 。
19、不管和谁有了矛盾和别扭,解决的时间不要超过24小时。否则麻烦会更多。在可以接受的范围内,先道歉。让自己做做坏人不是件真的坏事。 生活可以很复杂以可以很简单,我们不要总是活在忧伤和痛苦之中,爱自己多一点!不为一些不值得的事物而觉得生活总是那么的痛苦无助,人生的方向盘掌握在我们自己手里,有一天阳光大道等着我们走,放开自己,高傲的活着,只要自己幸福开心的,痛苦过去的伤就让他随风而去吧....告诉世界我们属于现在而不是过去!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

when you realise suddenly, you don't have the connection with the person you used to hang out with anymore, how will you feel?

i am wondering, am i the one whom changed, or is the other way round? but i just know that, it's not the same anymore, sigh...well, but i can't help it.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

who i am?

sometimes i really confused about my character, the real me. i think to quite a number of people, i am talkative, not shy? and easy to adapt to a new environment? even that day when i went for a job interview, the boss said that i like to talk -.- i was like replying "no lar not really", but i don't think he is convinced lar. but i do admit, under certain circumstance, i am talkative and like to joke around, i may not be a quiet and shy person, but i am not that cheerful as well.

i am nervous and maybe abit scared to enter into a new environment, to meet new people, because i will worry about if they are friendly? if what i say will offence them? if they will like me? i think this could be a sign of not confident enough. i can only be myself and feel comfortable with people whom i am familiar with by my side, after all these years, my independency is getting weaker, i just need to do things with partner? i just dun feel comfortable to do things alone? i enjoy companionship, that's why i really want to live with frens in this new country, but my budget will be a main problem =(((

tired. i think just stop here.

Friday, February 12, 2010

mixed feelings

when it is getting close to the end, time always FLIES. now thinking back, my 3 months here seems like a dream, practically i don't really have to worry much and my life goes on here.But i need to back to reality soon, when i back to auckland, and start my school life once again. By then, i need to mug again. mug for job, mug for daily expense, mug for school,mug for adapting the life there again. basically, no more honeymoon. But this is my choice, i cannot complain.

But i do miss the pple here. and basically, i feel myself back to "normal" again when i met him. at least finally, i have feeling for some1 older than me! but too bad, frm the day he came and the day i left, less than a month, there is nth much i can do, juz when i am able to joke with him and he is able to joke back with me, i have to go. i can only bring this crush to leave with me, but well, maybe back to nzl, i will be able to let go of this feeling, i know myself, i can't handle long distance, i am bad at keeping long distance relationship, let it be frens or others, because i am not really active in chatting online. But when i see the person face to face, I am able to get connected again, it feels good to get re-connected.

but anyway, he will be in sg for just a year then flight back to his own country, totally impossible. but that night, when 4 gals with 1 guy chit chat at coffee beam, i feel happy and don't wish to say goodbye.

realise i prefer to blog when my mood isn't tat good, i guess blog is really the place for me to vent my unhappy emotions? when i feel happy, i dont really feel a need to blog it here , but when i am feeling down, maybe by blogging here, i feel better, and i dont really like to share my problems in detail in real life, i think maybe that explains why. i shall just let my emo side shows here and face the real world with a positive attitude.

anyway, yesterday just got the news dat my uncle pass away. life is really fragile, the next morning u woke up, you realise the loved ones just left without any words. i really can't imaging how painful it can be and i really scared to face this ...no...

Monday, January 18, 2010

SHE

4 more weeks to go, sometimes just can't deny that time really flies, 3 months sounds so long yet i feel like as if i've just returned home.

random thoughts...

Sometimes won't you wonder...
2 persons, once so closed, suddenly,you just don't know where went wrong, they just split and getting lesser to talk to each other, slowly, when they see each other, just smile, say hi, and have some casual chit chats, no more heart to heart talks, you just suddenly have a weird feeling towards this once-so-closed friend,now, they just like some casual friends, you just contact or see them once in a blue moon or if lucky, bump into each other on the street.

i don't really know what happen to this particular one, and i wonder if she knows why, when i see you, at the moment, i feel excited, and heart beats abit faster than usual ( as if i've got feeling for you?), it made me sigh at the same time, because somehow i feel the gap in between. However, i just can't forgot those things u did, this made me become a small gas person and i decied not to give in. if some1 doesn't treat you the way like u do, forget it then.

i wonder when i will see you again, maybe bump into each other soon? sometimes i even thing that, if i were a boy, i guess maybe i will fall for you?

Saturday, January 09, 2010

Let the pictures do the talking

a dinner hosted by a kiwi family. super nice food and cute boy boy =)



nice mussel cooked by JW. receipt pls lol.

A simple dinner with ky. happy to drink my campell soup =)


ever since i've been in nzl, i enjoy hanging around starbucks more and more, during my last sem's exam, my highest record was to drink greentea latte consecutive five days..oh mine.

but in sg, greentea frapp seems more suitable?